An Exclusive NAAAP-KC Interview
By Pete Dulin, NAAAP-KC

Inspired by Alex Wong’s album Permission, the artist created The Permission Parties: a multi-sensory listening and tasting dinner series. NAAAP-KC hosts a Permission Party on Sept. 11-12, 7 PM, at Edgewater at City Center (clubhouse) with limited seating available. Register to reserve your seat. For NAAAP member discount, use code: Ihavepermission2023

Attendees will enjoy six Chinese-inspired dishes prepared by Wong that share some common emotion with each of the six tracks on the album. Wong shares a personal story about each course before serving and then shares the track while guests enjoy the dish. 

The purpose of The Permission Parties is to invest in the idea that everyone has permission to take up space in the world. “We don’t need to wait for it to be given,” says Wong, a second-generation Chinese American.

Wong, who has synesthesia, a condition that mixes up two unrelated senses in the brain, shared some insights about what life experiences formed the inspiration for the album and dinner party series. 

When did the idea of 'taking up space' first occur to you in life? Was it a gradual process or a sudden realization?

I think it was both gradual and sudden. As I started to allow myself to look more honestly at my childhood, many memories surfaced of being told to downplay my ethnicity in order to succeed in school, social groups, or in the mostly white music industry. I was encouraged to assimilate into white culture as a kid, speak without an accent, and keep myself small. Waves of shame and anger rushed to the surface as I realized how I had bought into this conditioning. It got to a point where a white person would say, 'I don't even think of you as Asian!' or 'You're attractive for a Chinese guy.' I would actually take it as a compliment because it meant my efforts to minimize that side of me were working.

I remember it coming to a head suddenly several years ago while writing a two-act theatrical musical called “The Paper Raincoat.” I suddenly realized that I had made all the characters white, for no other reason than the story was not explicitly about race. It was shocking to realize that I had been so conditioned to think of white as the default, the blank canvas on which you can tell universal stories. I didn't even think that someone who looked like me could tell my own story! I realized I had to reprogram a lot of conditioning I had accepted growing up and learn how to put myself at the center of my own story.

Was the feeling of not being allowed permission to take up space primarily externalized through media, American culture, family pressure, or other sources, or was there an internalized component?

I think media and culture are extremely powerful on everyone, but especially kids. When I had the rare chance to see a person that looked like me in movies or TV, I reflected and emulated what I saw. Asian characters were often portrayed as perpetually foreign, non-threatening, sidekicks, nerds, and punchlines. I thought those were the lanes I was allowed to operate in, so I didn't even allow myself to imagine things like writing and singing my own songs. I believe the tendency to hide is reinforced by cultural values I grew up with of not making waves, staying small and modest, and believing that calling attention to yourself was considered 'selfish.' I remember 'selfish' was the worst thing you could be called in my family.

Were you always aware of your synesthesia, or was it a gradual process of awakening and understanding this condition and how it could impact your creative output?

I have experienced synesthesia for as long as I can remember, but I only learned what it was a little later in life. I have vivid memories of songs from childhood that are mostly colors and textures. I loved certain songs because of specific chord changes that would 'look' a certain way and make me feel something particular. In fact, I once made a mixtape for my first girlfriend with songs whose chords and melodies I loved, without even considering the lyrics. She thought I was trying to break up with her. Later, I realized that what excited me about art and creating was finding relationships between seemingly unrelated things. I have always perceived parallels between my experience of food and music, and I wanted to create a project to share those relationships with others.
 

What has been the most challenging aspect of creating and executing The Permission Parties dinner series? And the most rewarding?

This project has been an incredible logistical challenge (Can you say spreadsheets?), mostly because we're trying to do something that I've never seen done before. There is no instruction manual or template to follow. It feels like we're making things up as we go, which is very exciting to me but also mentally and emotionally involved.

By far, the best part of this experience for me is that I have never felt so seen and heard as when presenting my food and music together. People seem to absorb the music, the tastes, and the stories in a deeper way. I feel everyone in the room becomes more connected after the experience. I love creating an intimate, safe space for people to share their own stories and connect with strangers in a new way. Moreover, I love being able to share a deeper experience of my art than I would be able to achieve at a regular concert.
 

+ More info about Alex, the Permission Parties, and to Register for Kansas City Permission Parties
 NAAAP member discount, use code: Ihavepermission2023